[Sanskrit chant] Tulsi, you are still sitting here. – It is time for the offering so
get the garland. – I will get it. Paraphernalia of the
offering can come later.. ..but first go and make
arrangements for the food. Kulraj, go and see if
grandfather has got ready or not. Okay sister-in-law. – Priest.
– Yes, madam. Badrinath has not come yet. He has gone for naming ceremony. Actually he gets more money there. He will surely come
before we light the diya. Hail to Venkata. Hail to Govinda. Start. Hail to Govinda. Govinda.. Govinda, Govinda.. Govinda.. Govinda, Govinda.. Govinda, Govinda.. Govinda.. Mother.. Govinda.. Govinda, Govinda.. [Sanskrit shlok] [Sanskrit shlok] Govinda, Govinda.. Govinda, Govinda.. Govinda, Govinda.. Great. You saved life of a child.
I will increase your salary by 10/- Now it is time for offering
at the goons house.. ..otherwise our salary will be cut. Today the work of offering
at goons’ house will be over. Is there any other
offering in the line? Marriage for next 5
days and then a shraadh. Arrangement for next
month will also be done. Brother. I have kidnapped the
reporter who tagged you.. ..as a rape mafia in the newspaper. Greetings master. I will go inside and you come later. Yes, you go and I
will park the motorcycle. You have come on time. Will I get over time
if I reach before time? Why are you bothered even if we
sell sand or organs of human beings? Are you responsible
for all the honesty? Will you just publish anything
if you have the liberty? We will write your misfortune. Why are they killing
before offering prayers? Priests break coconut
before starting anything new. They are goons. They break
heads before starting something new. You mean to say that coconut
and human beings are same for them. You offer prayers to God and they
make humans reach directly to God. Don’t scare me. If you ever publish
my name in newspaper.. ..then in next one hour the
news of your death will be published. Forget commission of this offering.
Come on let’s go. What are you looking here and there? Keep this betel leaf plate
in paraphernalia of the offering. Do not do any cheating.
I will go and have a bath. [Sanskrit shlok] [Sanskrit shlok] [Sanskrit shlok] [Sanskrit shlok] Priest, reduce the smoke.
Grandfather has started coughing. Are you crazy? If not smoke from the
flame of havan will come.. ..then will Menaka come out and dance? Priest, grandfather has asthma. Put less of wood and clarified butter. Then should we light
a candle and make offering. If you know everything
then you come and sit. Keep putting wood. Even you put. Offering is being made to
God so absorb some sacred smoke. [Sanskrit shlok] [Sanskrit shlok] [Sanskrit shlok] The offering is over. Did you notice something, grandfather? This offering was for everyone
but you are getting all the benefits. I promise you grandfather that very
soon you will get up from the chair. People blow their tensions in smoke.. Grandfather, grandfather.. But here the smoke killed him. He is dead. What happened, grandfather? Get up. – Grandfather.
– Oh no, he is dead. Don’t know how this happened? You are a priest and not a doctor.
Will you blow air into him? – Grandfather.
– Oh no, what has happened? What has happened? Priest, you killed
grandfather with the smoke. Has anyone died of this before?
He was destined to die today. This just became an excuse.
Where are we at fault in this? Lawyer, how did it happen? The priests gave too much
of scared smoke and he died. Hey, kill four of them here. – I think they are masons.
Run away from here. Even I am coming. Run, run.. Priest, stop. If I had run so fast in school
then I would have got gold medal. Run fast everyone. Run fast.. – Priest..
– I am tired. It is okay if I die
but I cannot run any more. – Take blessings of mother earth.
– Hail of earth mother. We are saved. If we did not bow our heads at the
right time then we would have died. Run. Master, look there.
Our vehicle has come. – Where did this come from?
– I had booked it online. – Enter.
– Is AC in the car? Let’s move. Did you see brother?
They left in AC taxi. Don’t thrash me, brother. Hey, just for commission
you called a fake priest. Do you think we are fools?
Tell me where do they stay? I am telling you the truth. I went to the temple and
whosoever I saw first I brought him. I swear I do not know their address. Hey Naari, we will surely kill them. Find them everywhere.
From temple, school to cowshed. Catch them as soon as you see them. Remove 8 kidneys of four of them. – Where is brother Azad?
– He is inside. You have acquaintances here as well. All religions are the same, master. Greetings, brother. How are you? Greetings. – How are you, brother?
– Absolutely fine with your blessings. Brother Azad, if you give us permission
then can we rest here for some time. He made us same but
we got divided in religions. People call Him by different names. But God is same for everyone,
Brother Kedari. – Thank you.
– You take rest. – Good bye.
– Will when will we hide here? We will file a complaint with police. Police has not done anything
for honest people like us.. ..so will they do
anything for these goons. We have become aimless. Where should
we go to save ourselves from them? – I have a plan.
– What is it? – Let’s leave from here.
-Where shall we go? Shall we go to America? – Naughty America.
– Will you go to America? Will you read Ramayana
in the church there? I will not go. I do not know English. Master, listen to me. So many
people from India go there every year. Won’t they need a priest? Temples have been
constructed there as well. If we go to America then
we will be benefitted in two ways. First, we will be saved
from these butchers. And secondly we will
earn a lot, master. Here 1/- is just 1/-
but there one dollar is 70/- If you think it over nicely
then our life will be good. We can offer prayers and earn as well. They will kill us
if we stay back here. It is better we go
to America and chill. To hell with America. I swear upon my soul that
I will never go to America. Listen to us. What times have come? I have
to hide like thieves in my own house. Then let’s go to America. You can
move around like a free bird there. If Foreign women poison our minds.. ..then all are values and
religion will go for a toss. What will you do of values? Priest are teaching Yoga
there and earning crores. I am not greedy for
money but of girls. I mean I have not got married yet.
I am 55 years old. – Who will marry me there?
– We will find a solution. Some foreigners give exchange offer. I want Indian. Indian chicken and
clarified butter is good.. ..but women and wine
should be imported. Please agree. Priest, the tickets are also cheap. Keep quiet. Do not irritate me. Priest, we can do many things there.
Toys for children and adults.. – Bundle.
– This is Taal Patra. How did they fall? – Kedarnath.
– Yes, priest. This Taal Patra is of ancestors.
How did they fall down? They should be kept carefully. Ancestors had written
my destiny in advance. Just think how advance
astrologer they were. Priets, have you
ever read your future? Yes. Show me. After 100 years in our third generation
a famous priest will be born. He will make his ancestors proud. Not only in India but abroad as well. He will take water from here
and mix it with the sea there. He will go to foreign country
and marry an Indian girl. This means you have not
been to foreign country.. ..so that is why you
have not got married. Your great ancestors
have written all this earlier. I have read it many times
but never came across this line. You must have forgotten
to read this line. Once we go to America then
Badrinath will get his bride.. – ..and we will not be killed.
– No, I will not go to America. Priest, I think they found
our address and will kill us. I have to go to perform
someone’s last rites. Nowadays everything
is linked with Adhaar Card. Let’s go from here. Go and thrash the priests. Go. You will not be spared, priest. – God save us.
– Run! Children of God believe in God. He will protect you. God never harms His children. Come on let’s pray together. Have you forgotten the way? We are tired.
Can we rest here for some time? My blessed one. Bhagwad Gita, Bible
teaches us lesson of humanity. Amen. Gentlemen. – Keep quiet and sit.
– Okay. Brother,
they must have gone to church. Will the priest offer
prayers in church? Have you gone mad? Let’s go ahead. If this continues.. ..then before I get married
and have children I will become bald. That is why we want you
to see Christmas before you die. I have no other option
but to go to Amrica. Let’s go to Amrica. Simon, don’t go back. We are coming. Will we go there and
wash Trump’s underpants? Don’t worry. I have a friend
there Adidas. Kalidas’s brother. Brother-in-law of Devdas.
What does he do there? Actually he is a trustee in
Venkateshwar temple in Los Angeles. He will make you the main priest.
He will make him the assistant. He will be his assistant
and he will make me the cashier. Kedarnath, now that we are going let
us fulfill the wish of my ancestors.. ..and take holy water
and mix with the sea of Amrica. – Then even I will get married.
– Such a small matter. Pravin, go with a pot
of brass and get the sea water. I will just get it. There are beautiful girls around. – Stop. I said stop.
– Where he come from? Please remove your watch, take out
belts, electronics, jackets and shoes. As soon as we entered
he started all this drama. To remove my dhoti is left. I had told you that I didn’t want
to go the country of shameless people. Master, there is strict vigilance. If they have any doubt then they
will ask us to remove our clothes. Don’t speak much otherwise they will
throw us there where Krishna was born. – Where?
– In jail. Where did the siren ring?
Has fire broken out somewhere? What is this?
What is this? Lift your Kurta. Kurta. Lift up the Kurta. Master, lift up the Kurta.
He wants to make a search. What will he do by lifting Kurta?
My dignity is dear to me. It is better that you
lift it before he insults you. What is this? They are bullets.
Are you all terrorists? – They are not bullets.
– They are blessed gadgets. Gadget? – That is for my marriage.
– What gadget? – These are for good luck.
– Luck. Auspicious. What is this? – Water.
– Water? Water of Chowpatty for having bath. What chaowapatty? Sacred Indian water. I think this is gold.
You are a smuggler. What is this? Actually this is
Hindu traditional water. Alright, you can go. Before I leave take my blessings. God help him to understand Hindi. What is he doing? Actually he is giving
you Hindu blessings. Go, go. Priest, I wanted to talk
something important with you. At present I am not in a mood.
We will talk later. – The matter is very serious.
– Let me see Amrica, dear. Great tall and beautiful buildings.
The weather too is great. Hurry up. Please come, master. Hurry up. The girls here are beautiful. There are two aliens as well.
Let’s take a photograph. Say chees! Give it to me. – Govinda, Gopala, Govinda, Gopala..
– Master, listen to me. Amrica, Amrica.. Wow! Stars on the ground!
Let’s sit on the stars. Hey Cycle Jackson.. Sir..listen to me. Come on let’s dance. Amrica is not that bad. You had talked about your friend Adi.
Just give him a miss call. We will go to the
temple and have a bath. Adidas, his number master.. Adi, master, number..why
are you speaking in slow speed? I do not have his number. What do you mean? There is no one by
the name Adidas, master. You cheated your master. If not Adidas then cal Jamnadas. Here only I am your Das. Now will we stay in Sunny
Leone’s house in America? Master was not ready to
come to America so I said lies. Is this the way you cheat your master? That day you were boasting. I would be the priest in Amrica.. ..he would be my assistant
and he would be his assistant. And that trustee? To win your trust I
made a story of a trustee. No one will even give
alms in a stranger country. Why are you silent now?
Have you vowed not to speak? I am sure you will make
us clean bathroom here. How does it open? Shall I break it? Where should I put in this stick? Oh no.. – You trapped us in lies.
– Go. What is this? – Where did he trap us?
– In America. American Vada pav. What days are we seeing? In India even the goat
will not eat this bread. – Water..
– Master.. I feel like drowning in this water. In our country we were middle class but
have become third class in foreign. This is called suicide. Do hard work. He made us laborers. He is responsible for everything.
Get lost. – He is..
– Everything happened because of him. I feel like killing you. I became a cook from being a priest. Earlier we used to ask
people to buy paraphernalia.. ..and now we keep on collecting
things from morning till evening. Take this. Eat this apple. A priest who used to get
offering is now getting alms. Everything has got
jammed because of burger. What did they eat before coming here? Can you tell me something about this? – Can you tell me something about this?
– No. I am tired. Govinda.. You.. This is heaven. Fairies.. The trailer of heaven. Fairies.. Menaka, Urvashi, Rambha.. Here is money for you..here
is everything for you. What shameless acts you are doing,
master. Let’s go from here. Let us reap the fruits
of our good deeds. Excuse me. Have you seen? You are mine so truly. Will you drink alcohol?
Make him drink. No thanks. Take it madam. One minute.
I will taste and then tell you. Very tasty. Drink it. Good. What had we thought
of and what has happened? He made us a fool here. I feel like burying
you under statue of Liberty. Your future is bright like your face. There is chance of three
girls in your horoscope. Wake up my dear. Get up my dear. I have still to learn a lot from you.
I have not asked you to die, sir. Why don’t you die? God..thrash him. Run. Wait. He is snoring and so is he. Hey, can you help me, please? No, sorry. Hey, they are kissing each other. – Sir, stop.
– I will look at them closely. What are you doing? – Get up. It is afternoon.
– -Who is it? – Where is our master?
– We have one room kitchen house. If he is not here then he
must be in the line of common toilet. He is not there so that
is why I am asking you. God knows where he has gone. [Sanskrit chant] Master, you are resting here.
You came here without telling us. We were so worried.
Come on let’s go home. I will not go anywhere. I have done cleaning in Mall,
bar, restaurant, super market. I will fall at the feet of the trustee
of this temple and clean this temple. And will stay here.
You all go. I will not come. Think of devil and here he is. Please come. Greetings. – Greetings.
– My name is Badrinath. I was a respectable priest in India. My bad luck that I came
here on my disciple’s insistence. If you give permission.. ..then I will stay here
at the feet of God and serve Him. I will sleep on the steps of temple. “Swami Narayan..
You are supporter of your disciples.” “I have come at your door step,
Swami Narayan.” “You are supporter of your disciples.” “I have come to your door
step and fulfill my wishes.” “Swami Narayan..” “You are supporter of your disciples.” Come on everyone take the blessings. Priest, the girl who was
singing the religious song.. She has gone. I don’t know her but
she has gone that side. Thank you. Hi. There was a girl singing inside.
Did you see her? Yes, look she is going there. Thank you. What are you looking at?
Did you see the Kailash Parbat? This was strange than that also, sir. But could not meet. But I got it. Strangest news. What is that? I got work of cleaning
and sweeping this temple. – Really.
– Yes. You should be eating
sweetmeat on this note. – Where is Sanctimony beach?
– Why? Have you forgotten that
I have to go and mix water there? [english rap song] Hey, I think that girl
forgot to wear her clothes. Shall I put my scarf on her? Be careful sir. The atmosphere is so good here. She made me whistle. If you would have shown
me these beautiful pictures.. ..of Amrica on Google or You Tube.. ..then I would have
dragged you to Amrica. Listen Kedarnath,
you are still young.. ..and I should not
be talking this to you. But on seeing the beauty
of women of Amrica I am shaken. Master, be careful. I will go and mix this
Indian water with foreign water. Then my horoscope written on
that Tal Patra will turn out be true. And I will get home
cooked food as well. It will 100% come out to be true. Oh God, make me meet a pure Indian
girl will good Indian moral values. As soon as I mixed
the water there was a stir. Restlessness..she seems
to be a water fairy. If master comes to know that
I had written that Tal Patri.. ..then he will drown in
this sea and commit suicide. That means master’s ancestors
had not written all that. – No.
– That means you wrote all that. What if he comes to know that
the message on Tal Patri was fake? – Will you tell him?
– No. Renuka. Hey Renuka. [english rap song] Dolly! Yes. It is lunch time so let’s go home. Swami Narayan.. She comes everyday
at Sanctimony beach. You go back.
I will come after offering prayers. Sorry, sorry I did not see you. I have never seen you here before. I have got a new job here. My name is Surekha. I often come here. My name is Badrinath.
I always stay here. – Where have you come from?
– From Amravati. Okay. I am from Lucknow
and work in Indian Association. Do tell me if you have work. – Listen.
– Yes, master. Yesterday I mixed water
and today I found her. – I feel like wooing her.
– Put a break on your feelings. Madam, other than offering
paryers in temple.. ..our master does naming
ceremony to Shraadh. If you prefer we can give
commission to you as well. Commission? I don’t want.
It is our boss’s marriage next month. From engagement to wedding
vows you only perform all the rituals. Thank you madam. Tomorrow I will
introduce you to my boss. Good morning, boss. Good morning. Doesn’t short circuit take place? All wiring of his body is open. Talk softly. Otherwise he
will crush you with his muscles. Boss, the priests have come. Badrinath and Kedarnath. Greeting. – Priest.
– Yes. Don’t worry about the expenses. Take out such an auspicious time
for wedding that there is no problem. Goddess Saraswati always
makes our Master say the truth. Not even Yamraaj
can stop this marriage. – Surekha.
– Yes boss. Put 50,000/-pounds in their account. Yes boss. Maneka, if the horoscope
of the girl and the boy matches. Then I will match and
fix the most auspicious time. – Greetings Priest.
– Greetings. He is Veer Singh,
and this is his wife. – Greetings.
– This is the girl’s uncle and aunt. Hope you have fixed
the auspicious time. The stars of the couple were
unfavorable. But master aligned them. Our master is specialist in astrology. Surekha, was praising him a lot. I am special for her
and she is special for me. Should I fix the auspicious time
for me too, on this divine occasion? The work is on. Pundit, why are you
waiting in the sun. – Please come in.
– Welcome. Where are you? Come soon. Hey. – Hey.
– Gurudev. Do you remember the old man? Who reached heaven because
of your fire worship? She is his granddaughter Renuka. – Guruji, we are finished.
– Our bad luck. We escaped then, but have
fallen into the death trap now. You are such a great astrologer,
can’t you fix your own horoscope? Sorry. Pundit, what have you done
that you are hiding your face. The bride has come,
begin the ceremonies. Marriage ceremonies or death ceremony. Greetings daughter. We have come to fix an
auspicious time for your wedding. Why is she crying? It’s our turn to cry? Master, Renuka’s eyes are wet,
but tears are rolling from his cheeks. Are both hitched? Hey Renuka. Renuka. Renuka. What happened to you? Kedari? You were a bachelor. Then
from where did this woman come from? Watching you both, it seemed
like the unison of Ganga and Yamuna. And we are in not in
America but Prayag Raj. Now why are you standing
like the statue of liberty? What’s cooking in your head? Tell me. Or else I will go to
Santa Monica and kill myself. Guruji, listen. I have actually come
to America for Renu. That day when we went
to Chintamani’s house to pray. His granddaughter had
come home from America. Hey grandfather. Where
are you grandfather? I have come. Hey Gopal look my granddaughter
has come from America. -Take me there.
– Ok sir. – Grandfather.
– Wow you have grown a lot. I missed you so much,
my darling grandpa. You have become so thin. – Renuka!
– Hi Aunty. Hi uncle. – How are you?
– I am fine .How are you? Super. – I am fine younger uncle.
– How are you Renuka? – Hi! How are you?
– How are you Renuka? I am very well. Vidhya. Come on. Hello everybody. Hey, what kind of chair is this? Grandpa. This is an
electronic wheel chair. – Look at this.
– Be careful. Careful. Look at it. I don’t have a license for it. You don’t need a license for it.
I have got it from America for you. You can sit on it and go to
the bedroom, and even the washroom. Now there is no need to push you. Oh then let’s go for a drive. Be careful, relax. – Oh wow.
– Press right. – It’s moving very smoothly.
– How is it? Awesome. You drove very well. Dear, I am such a lucky man. Your parents left you for me. But there is nobody
to take care of you. I miss them a lot. Grandpa you are there
to take care of me. Enough, let’s go in. come. Both of you quickly freshen up.
Today there is a prayer at home. – Kedarnath
– Yes master. Have you got all the
ingredients for worshipping? Wood, clarified butter, flowers and
fruits, everything is at its place. You just make this, successful.
Then we can launch our online app. May your words come, true. Once the app is launched then.. ..we will be saved from giving
commissions to the middlemen. Then we will drive a Maruti 800. – That’s awesome master.
– Now stop flattering. Go and bring the Urn,
or else, I will deduct your salary. I will go and check. Take this. Thank you. Glory to Krishna. Glory to Krishna. Hope nobody has seen. I don’t know. Saved. Nobody has seen it. Seen, and am wounded. I am burned. Kedari. Hey Kedari. My thoughts are corrupted. Why is he swinging like a drunkard? I can’t work as a Pundit any more. Yes, it will definitely be. Hey Kedari, my heart is peaceful
after watching such a hot scene. Concentrate on your work.
Focus on prayers. Ok even though it was by mistake. This
beautiful flower is a gift by Him. Hey, Kedari. – Master, I want to urinate?
– You want to use the bathroom. Is beauty of a woman, virtue or a sin? It is much above, vice and virtues.
Why are you asking a bachelor? You don’t look it,
but you are a flirt. Don’t discuss this,
or you will get beaten. What’s up, Pundit? Hope all the prayer
ingredients are there. You don’t worry at all. We can begin worshipping in 5 minutes. – Greetings grandfather.
– Welcome Sheela. She is very special.
Consider her as our own. – Greetings, Pundit.
– Greetings. Please grant permission
to begin the prayers. Yes of course. – Hail Krishna, Guruji.
– Welcome Mr. Lawyer. You have come at the right time. Guruji, once upon a time you
were the greatest lawyer of the city. Yet you made a petty lawyer,
like me your disciple. Please don’t embarrass
me by respecting me. I have come, just to pray.
If you grant permission. Yes you are welcome. All the family members
please sit down. Offerings before worshipping? When God favors, then success is mine. – Give me the ashes.
– Give me the mirror. – Hey give me.
– Make use of this steel plate. Where is the incense stick? Ok, grandfather host,
all the preparations are done. Who will begin the prayers? This auspicious prayer
will be done by my granddaughter. Dear Renuka. Grandpa. Ok so you have come. – Pundit,
– Yes. She is my granddaughter.
Her parents have died. This fire offering is done so that,
there never be any trouble in her life. Excellent, for the next 9 days. Prayers, worshipping,
fire offerings, chanting mantras.. I will do everything to bless her.
Come dear light the fire. [Sanskrit shlok] [Sanskrit shlok] Host, the first chapter is over.
Make arrangements for refreshments. – You also come along.
– Yes. I have to eat lunch, give me little. Give me some offerings too. Pundit, you distribute to the world,
yet you are asking me? What I distribute is offering.
If you give me it will become nectar. Ok, take. My ears are yearning to hear the name. Divya Bharti. Is she wooed? She isn’t wearing toe rings,
nor the wedding thread on her neck. So it’s an open invite for me. – I have to meet her alone.
– Hey Kedari. – Yes Guruji.
– What’s happening? Where are you running
without greeting your guru? I had some personal work. Ok, may god give you success in that? My success is standing in front of me. As you wish. What a fantastic Indian tradition. The pundit is conducting
the prayers so well. He is not an ordinary Pundit.
It seemed as if the almighty himself. – Greeting.
– Greetings madam. I want to talk with you personally. – Please do.
– Yes. I have seen you nude. Oh I can’t show my face. No, not you. Had he seen my young body,
I would have died. – I saw her.
– What? What does nude mean? Simple. Without clothes. How, when did you see?
And why did you see? I will speak the
truth and nothing else. It’s about that day. When my master sent me to
get the Urn from the first floor. And suddenly I heard
western music from somewhere. Don’t tell me in parts
like the episodes of a serial. This is not an episode of a serial,
I saw the whole movie. – My eyes are content.
– Hey you. Tell me in detail. Promise me,
what we are going to converse now.. ..you will not tell anybody. Wednesday morning
at exactly 4.32 minutes. When the moon, entered the
auspicious planet of Phalguni. What is Phalguni? I am robbed. Why don’t you make me
understand in a simple language? I mean when the planet Jupiter
was positioned in my good luck place. And Venus in the place of happiness. That very day the door
of luck opened for ever. What more can I say,
that’s why the auspicious time came. Where I got an opportunity
to see you naked. Shut up, you are not a priest,
but a fraud. You are fake. Here hold your coconut,
and break your head. He saw you before baby
doll can become Barbie doll. Shut up. Ok, it was ok that you had seen,
but what was the need to disclose? I can’t tell anybody else
that I had seen you naked. – That’s why I told you.
– Shut up. Why are you so angry? Hey, should I wash your legs
and drink that? What do you want? Listen there is prayers
and worshipping done at home. You should burn the
fire not the heart. Watching you dance,
even I want to open a dance school. If I ever get bored, I will
close my eyes and think of your dance. Stop your nonsense and
get out from here. Get lost. He must have seen my black spot too. This pundit is cheap,
he might tell others too. – You are right.
– Hey Pundit. Stop. – Yes madam.
– Forget everything that you have seen. – Don’t tell anything to anybody.
– Yes. Will I ever tell this to
anyone on such a holy occasion? Delete everything. I will write all
your words in a paper.. ..make it as an amulet
and wear it around my neck. I will file a case
of harassment on you. – Erase it.
– Ok fine. I will. God promise. Don’t cry baby. He will never be able
to forget your black spot. Grandpa there are more
than 1000 films in this. Films from south,
Hindi films, and many more. There are songs too. It has your childhood pictures too,
and this is your wedding snap. Grandpa,
this has our whole family in it. We can click selfie videos
along with selfie photos. Grandpa, tell me who is your favorite?
Tell me, isn’t it me? My favorite was your granny. She spent 60 years with me
and now has left me alone and gone. Dear Renuka, I just have
one wish which you need to fulfill. And which is that?
Tell me, I will fulfill it. It’s not a very big wish. I had
immersed your granny ashes at Kashi. Immerse my ashes there too, dear. Grandpa, please be quiet. You still have to get me married. And play with my kids,
and even get them married. Oh god, you have so many demands.
Come let’s go and eat. – Hey Kedari
– Yes master. Am I performing the rituals properly? Awesome, such rituals neither
have been done in the last 100 years.. ..nor will be done
in the next 100 years. Your name will be recorded
in the Guinness book of the Pundits. Now a days I am blessed. [Sanskrit shlok] Wow, what a girl,
face like a lotus, narrow waist.. ..I am wounded by her skin. [Sanskrit shlok] Host, the second day has concluded.
Bring the food. Bro, did she wink at you or me? Don’t dream, she has winked
at both of you. But at me. Why you started taking
something else as donation? I have sighted her from day one. Master has begun. Listen, the fruits, sweets and
coconut, hang all this on my cycle. I will be back with the donations. Take this and bless us. Blessings. Hang everything on
the handle of my cycle. And nothing should go in your stomach.
Do you get it? Hang some on my cycle too. You focus on your work.
I will eat the fruits. Oh God, this is called
hard earned money. Master wipe your sweat with towel. Oh god, this is disastrous. Hey master. – Don’t touch that towel.
– Why? What’s wrong? Kedari. Wonder who has done, what with that? Can only wipe the face.
What else can be wiped? – But this towel is not worth you.
– Why? Are there thorns in this towel? You don’t understand. In this,
on Wednesday at evening 4.30, I Pundit, keep your mouth shut. Madam, he is my master.
I can’t hide anything from him. I said, keep quiet. He won’t say anything,
except to his devotees and disciples. I will push him hard. When the planetary positions.
When Jupiter. Hey Pundit, be careful. Hey, what are you doing? Hey, bag of grains,
why did you push the poor guy? – I was disbalanced.
– What if my Kedari died? Where do we get such a cheap guy? Hey Kedarnath. You saved me, or else, I don’t
know with whom I would have banged. Grandpa, in the picture,
you have moustache.. ..and in reality you are clean shaven. Oh, it’s that,
when my granddaughter was young. When I kissed her,
my moustache hurt her. So she stubbornly
made me shave it off. You take such good
care of your granddaughter. Tell me Pundit, have you grandchildren
too made you shave off your moustache? He would have had
grandkids if he had a son. And he would have had a son,
had he been married. Lot of prayers were conducted to
eliminate the positions of the planets. But nobody agreed. The horoscope did not math with other. I will surely find someone
by the time this fire offerings.. ..and prayers are over. Yes I will check it later. My luck has changed at old age. A woman has turned and stared at me. Master, what wrong?
She was winking at you. Did you notice?
Fire is equal on both the sides. – Host, now we will take leave.
– Ok fine. Bless me for the wedding. Bless you, hope you marry quickly. – Why did you take the blessings?
– I was exercising. Ok, we are leaving. This is such a sweet and juicy mango. – I came to India for this.
– Vidya, stop your nonsense. Think of ways to take
revenge from the Pundit. – Hey, I have an idea.
– Tell me. I will go to the Pundit and ask.. ..Pundit who do you do ‘Sashtang
Namaskar (complete submission to god)? Demonstrate and show me.
And he will agree. As soon as he lays down on the floor. You coming running
at the speed of 100. And put your 100kg weight on his back. I got it, his back will break.
And we can take revenge. – Yes.
– High 5. – I checked it’s the auspicious time.
– Pundit. What is it? Pundit, will you please
do something for me? Yes, of course,
tell me what do I have to do? Tell me,
who do we do Sashtang Namaskar? It’s very easy,
will show you right now. First sit on your knees and bow down. I did not get it. Show me properly. Sashtang Namaskar is very easy,
I will show you. You have to lie down like this,
and then close your eyes.. ..say the name of Ganesh,
with all your might. Sashtang Namaskar. Oh God. – Who ran the road roller?
– It was by mistake. There will be a mistake, if
you keep and elephant’s baby at home. This elephant weighing 250kgs,
if lifts her leg on you.. ..then the person
goes straight to heaven. I said sorry.
Mole got trapped instead of the mouse. Hope you are fine.
Yes, I am. Give her turmeric milk,
she looks pale. – Help me.
– Let’s go. I have come after 10 years dear. My eyes were yearning
to see this lush green grass. Grandpa, now that I have come,
I will bring you here every day. That’s very good. – Greetings master
– Greetings. I have never seen you before.
Who are you? Hey. Who are these people? Hey Pundit.
There are no prayers happening here. Go away. Don’t you know,
I pray to Lord Vishnu.. ..who has 10 incarnations
to destroy the demons? I will not sin on this earth.
Neither will I let you do. Oh god, Violence.
Kedarnath, brawl is in progress. We will lose our donations
if something happens to grandpa. Grandpa, on your own fields,
how did the farmers become butchers? Yes, just look at it. Master, stop them. How can a nonviolent Brahman,
face 10 demons single handedly. Hey, hey, don’t come ahead. I will pray and worship
free of cost at your home. It is a sin to hit a Brahmin. Hey is someone there. – Please stop him.
– Hey Kedari. Go and save the daughter. God, please help. Hey. Thank you god. Who attacked my granddaughter? Tell me his name. Why isn’t anyone answering? Is it anyone from you? You are unnecessarily
getting tensed father in law. Maybe he came to steal the jewelry. They did not come to steal. They tried to kill Renu. Send her back to America today itself. Father, they prayers
are being done for her. We can’t send her till they are over. Father in law, don’t worry. I will anyhow find out the coward. You don’t worry. How will I ever be
able to repay this debt? Grandpa, you don’t worry at all. Who have has done
this disgusting thing. I swear on you.
I will search and get him to you. Please trust me. – Hi dad.
– Have you gone mad? Why did you send goons to kill Renuka? Dad please listen to me. What could I have done,
as she refused to marry? – Should I have gone and
found a groom for her. – Shut up. – I am not wrong.
– Keep quiet. You shut up. Listen to me. If you send goons and get
her killed then it’s all over. All her property will
directly go to the trust. We don’t cut the hen
which gives golden eggs. If you marry her anyhow. You will be
the owner of millions of properties. And what if she doesn’t agree. Renuka is an orphan,
she has nobody except the old man. You know your father very well.
Son, now be a bit patient. Son, let the right time come. I will definitely
make Renuka your bride. Just wait and watch. Come on dear.
It’s your birthday today. – Give sweets to grandpa.
– Please take sweets. Yes, Happy Birthday, dear. – Hey Pundit.
– Yes, Host. It’s my granddaughter birthday today. – Bless her.
– Kedari, bless her. – As you wish master.
– Go, dear. Dear, in your life,
hope everything is prosperous. Has a cow kicked you?
Can’t you say prosperous? Everything in your life is prosperous. You live a 100 years. – I am dead.
– What? Has a nail got stuck in your leg? I was saying, may you excel in life. May you always, be blessed? What is this? You started again? Master I am dead. Dead? You are talking
about death on birthdays? That too in front of a kid.
Don’t you have any sense? You let it be. I will bless. May you ,prosper May you be, blessed Study a lot, and proper ahead. Remain healthy and have a long life. Please arrange prayers for me too,
the way it’s been done for her. No, dear we can’t afford it. They are rich people. – You go and get sweets.
– Ok. – May you always, live a content life.
– Pundit, it’s also my birthday today. Bless me too, just like her. What are you doing her?
Go away from here. Go away. – Hey, why are you doing that?
– You don’t interrupt. How can a maid’s daughter
be equal to mine? I told you not to go,
then why did you go there. Sister, please stop, what are
you doing? She is such a sweet girl. You are hitting her and
what mistake has she made.. ..by asking for blessings
in her birthday? Come dear. You want to be blessed.
Come I will bless you. Sit here. And look towards me. May you always be blessed in life. Hope you have a long life.
And you live a 100 years. May you attain,
wealth, knowledge and prosperity. Will she become wealthy
if you bless her? Money can’t buy all the happiness. Happiness of the heart
is equally important. Host. Today on this auspicious
occasion at this house. The marriage of Lord
Srinivas has been concluded. Very soon, you darling
daughter too will find a groom.. ..young and handsome,
with god like qualities. May she be blessed. God has arrived. – She is hinting again.
– Please focus here. Excellent food has
been arranged for all. Hope your business of
worshipping is doing well. – By your blessings.
– Greetings. I have heard, if you worship, we
get directly contacted with the God.` Master. I will be happy if
you worship at my home. I will be happier.
This is my good fortune. – Did you have meals?
– Yes twice. Did you see? She winked at me. So, what does that mean? It means only one thing
that she is in love with me. That means your love affair is on? Hey you petty Pundit,
by reading the stories of Krishna. You yourself are dreaming of love. Not only to Krishna,
but she winks at the Gopi’s too. And I know this as she is my wife. We are married and even registered it. – Wife?
– Yes she is my darling. She broke a bachelor’s heart.
She will go to hell one day. Your loose shutter
has corrupted a holy man. Pundit. Did you come here, looking for me? I, Came to give the offerings. Do you want to tell me something? But you are scared to tell me. Or you are restless
to hear that from my mouth. Am I right? Tomorrow evening at 4.32 minutes.
After the prayers are over. On the auspicious
planetary positions.. ..I want to have a special conversation
with this renowned Pundit. I am burnt. The next day after the prayers. I was
searching for her everywhere at home. But I couldn’t find her anywhere
and grandfather died that very day. I came to know Renuka had
gone back to America that night. And I came here in search of her. That means you haven’t come to America
because you were scared of the goons. You came here, smelling like a dog. So you also did the mischief
of the bamboo leaves. Uniting both the waters. My unison. That prophecy was fake. Will you construct my
tomb for your love? Go to hell. Master, I want to
know how grandpa died. – Please listen.
– Don’t be a CID. If you go to that house again
you will be slaughtered like a goat. Master, we earn the
whole year and give you. Forgive him, it’s a small mistake. Yes, please forgive. Please Master. Oh where am I trapped?
This hair left will also disappear. You have put your head to be grinded. Let’s go. – What are you saying?
– Greetings, host. – Greetings.
– Is the bride ok? Pundit, she was on a
diet so she must be giddy. Now she is absolutely fine. Raja, where is your father?
Can we meet him once? Is he alive? He will be dead. – Hey Pundit.
– Sorry. You father was not seen so
my master blurted out his suspicion. Master can see 10 years ahead. My father is in India. He will slaughter the heads of the
pundit and sit in the flight to America. You will sin,
if you cut the head of the Pundit. – Is it ok if we just cut the hair?
– Keep your mouth shut. They can cut their
head or their moustache.. ..we should not interfere
in their personal matter. Master, let’s go up and
choose an auspicious time. Are you sending me up? Because you are the
most experienced here. – Will I have to go?
– Yes surely. Should I go alone? Welcome sir. I am choosing an auspicious
time for my death. I have to reach to Renuka. Before that you will reach heaven. Anyhow I have to talk to her. Sir, please read
their wedding invites. – Yes begin.
– Hi dad. Hi Vicky. How are you? – How is America?
– America is great dad. Did you find those Pundits? No, I will kill him
and then come to America. Make his beheaded face your,
what’s app DP. Not only his head,
but cut all his parts. That’s great dad. Ok my son, tell me how
are the wedding preparations? Dad just going to
fix the auspicious time. Pundit is here. Ok, very well. Give him the phone.
I want to talk with him. Ok. Stay connected. My dad, wants to talk to you. He will get me into trouble. I can’t
discuss these things over the phone. I have to meet personally
and talk face to face. Dad is on a video call. It’s not my habit to chat on a video. Vicky, let me talk to Pundit. Pundit, talk to dad. Greetings host. Hey. Sir, we are talking for the first
time. Hope everyone is fine in India. How is the whether there? Sir, you are happy to see me. Host, your health is not looking good. Why don’t you get some prayers done?
Your soul will get some peace. I will burn the coal
on your funeral bier. Pundit Badrinath will
do you funeral ceremony. Where is Kedarnath? Kedarnath must be at Kedarnath itself. Are you joking with me? My disciple is here, let me introduce. Kedari. God of death. Kedari. You are finished. I am tired of searching for you here. And you are sitting
there next to Trump. Yes, we have come to fix the suspicious
time for your son’s wedding. Fix it soon as now the suspicious
time of your death will be out. I am taking the morning flight.
I will reach America and cut you all. Am I carrot or a radish
that you will cut me? It’s easy to threaten,
come face me if you have the guts. I am coming. Come and see. I will kill you. You are finished. Take the first flight,
and come old man.. ..I challenge you will make you a
beggar, or else don’t call me Kedari. Don’t escape from America. Ok, done. Either one of us will die,
it’s decided. Come on. Come. He is the god of death, not a pigeon,
that you are calling him like this. He will come out of the phone. Sir. Don’t be hurt by the words of
the son. You take your time to come. I will give you such a death that
even the God of death will shiver. Master let him come.
I will do his funeral ceremony. Come. Hey Pundit,
hand over the phone to my son. Quickly give the phone. Pundit. Have you finished talking? Kadari, what to do now, if we go
up while talking, we will burst out. Where are you priest? Master don’t worry at all,
you keep acting as talking to him. And while returning him the phone,
drop it down. Come on go. Don’t get tensed. – Quickly hand the phone to Vicky.
– Yes I am giving. – Vicky. Vicky.
– Shut up. How much will you bark? If Vicky comes to know about this.
Then he will pile all your bodies. Remember this. Did you hear, Pundit? Give Vicky the phone. Son your dad speaks such sweet words. Pundit, you are finished. Vicky. Vicky. It slipped, my hands were oily. No worries Pundit. Come. Let’s talk of the wedding. Listen, you have
to quickly do one thing. What is that? There should be no
calls from India, here. You both talk away everyone’s phones.
And block all Indian numbers. Hurry. Vicky. Vicky. Pundit you are finished. Madam will you give me your phone,
there is no network on my phone. – Yes surely, take.
– Thank you. Madam there is no network
on my phone can I make a call please. Thank you. – Sir, will you please give
me the phone. – Why? – There is no data in my phone.
– Here take. I will watch the movie
of Gold mine and return you. – What happened brother?
– All the 4 Pundits are in America. Vicky’s phone is switched off. Connect the call to Viru. Hurry. – I can’t connect the call.
– What? What is this happening? Call Meera, come on hurry up. I am connecting. Meera’s phone is switched off. How is it possible? – The number you have dialled is
switched off. – Something is wrong. Book tickets to America right now. On 31st of March.
On the 2nd date of the month of April. When the moon will
enter the constellation.. ..and sun enters the zodiac Taurus. Son of Mr.
.Subramanian, Vikram alias Vicky. With Mr. Dev Kumar Aditya Rao’s,
and Mrs. Vijaya Lakshmi’s.. ..daughter, Miss Renuka. The wedding is arranged.
Bless you all. It’s the best auspicious
time of this year. Listen my time is elapsing,
if you grant me permission can I eat. Ok Pundit. All of you join. Kedari, have you gone mad? Why did you come here to America? You were going to tell
me something that day. I came to America to hear that. You made me worship very well. I just wanted to tell
you thanks for that. No the matter is something else. No, I am speaking the truth. You are lying. Then what is the truth? You love me. What love? And with you. I just met you for 7 days in India. And you think I love you for 7 lives. I know grandpa was fond of you. But that doesn’t mean I am in love. You misunderstood
my jovial nature as love. I don’t believe. It doesn’t matter whether
you believe or not. Nor do I want to make you believe. Please go away from here. Master, you know I don’t drink. This is not alcohol, but black coffee. You know in my generation,
people would become alcoholics. Now a day’s generation
want a multi sim. If one expires then
the other is active. If not Kareena, then Karishma,
if not Karishma then Raveena.. ..if not Raveena then Zarina.
So, that’s the way. Son, women are a tricksters. I am not unhappy that
Renuka doesn’t love me. But she is in trouble now.
She is being forced to marry. You are absolutely right. Renuka loves Krishna a lot. Hey you shut up. It’s ok to join others, but
you are trying to jump in with others. I am not lying, it’s all true. – I swear on his head.
– Shut up! You want to kill me in my prime youth. Anyways this moon is eclipsed. Krishna,
listen, I am telling the truth. A day before the last prayer,
Renuka went to meet grandpa. – Grandpa
– Yes. What’s the matter dear? Will you listen to me grandpa? Dear, have I ever neglected
anything of yours? Tell me, what is it? Actually grandpa, I am in love. Wow, who is the lucky guy? His name is Kedarnath. Kedari, the Pundit? But he isn’t lucky, you are. If you want to marry.
My son is there to marry. Property worth crores,
will you give to a mere Pundit? And we will not do anything about it? I will pull your skin. You will only marry my son. I have already told you this.
I will not marry you. My son was the one who attacked you. What did you say? For money
you want to kill my granddaughter? Master. I am giving
you an advice free of cost. Don’t Donate the
property worth crores. Haven’t you heard the saying?
Dogs can’t digest the sweet pudding. Let it be among the family. Let Renuka marry his son Vicky. You are the master. My master.
And your daughter is my client. But I will waive off the fees. Sign the agreement. Even if you kill me. I will
not let my granddaughter marry Vikram. Shut up, you old man. – Father.
– Stay away. Are you not ashamed,
you raised your hand on grandfather? On you also. I keep quiet in front of everyone.
So did you think I was Rama? I am Ravan. I will kill everyone. Grandpa. From today onwards,
only I will rule this house. – I will cut that Pundits head.
– Let it be, it will be very expensive. If we harm the Pundit. Then the judge at the court
will keep extending the dates. And if you interrupt
the prayers in the middle. Then media will make
different kind of stories. And after that I will
get tired of wearing coat.. ..and going to the courts repeatedly. So let the prayers continue. After that the love story of the pundit,
will be sold to the hawkers by me. Did you understand? Grandpa kept crying
think of his humiliation. He suffered from a heart attack because
of that pain during the prayers. After that day,
Renuka and I were looked in a room. That means, that day grandpa did not
die because of the fumes of the prayers. But because of the grief
caused by his son in law. – Whatever it is. Why should we bother?
– You shut up. After all that why
is Renuka marrying Vicky. For grandpa’s ashes. RI P, rip. Which means Rest in peace. Master was a very good man,
I genuinely pay homage to him. Grandpa wanted his ashes
to be immersed at Kashi. This was his last wish.
His soul will then be at peace. Darling, have you heard the story.. ..where the soul of the
fairy was trapped in a parrot. Similarly this fairy’s
life is trapped in this. Catch it Raja. Raja, sent these ashes
to Vicky immediately to America. – Send by cargo.
– Ok. What is all this? This is wrong. Lower your voice. If you want to give peace
to your grandpa’s soul. Then you have to listen to me. What are you saying? Renuka, its clear business, give
from on hand and take from the other. Listen to me carefully.. ..I am telling you clearly in Gujrati,
so that you understand. Marry Vicky and the Urn
of ashes will belong to you. As soon as the ceremony begins,
will give you the ashes. Then directly go to Kashi. No I will not marry. Ok then, then we will immerse these
ashes not at Kashi but in the gutter. You are forcing me. The wedding will surely take place. Renuka has agreed to marry
Vicky only for grandpa’s ashes. What kind of ransom is this?
That for ashes anyone can be married. Ashes need to be immersed. They can be immersed anywhere,
how does it matter? Hey shut up you both. It can just be ashes for us. But for
Renuka, it is last wish of grandpa. For that wish she is
ready to kill her desires. This shows the goodness of Renuka. But Vicky is not a nice man. I fear he will kill
Renuka after the wedding. It will not happen till I am alive. From today, it’s my
responsibility to protect Renuka. You are talking as
if you are an LIC Agent. Our death is on its
way from India to America. – Hello.
– Who. Pushing in front of the airhostess,
say sorry at least. Hey you work as Pundit’s in India. – No, sir we work as a barber.
– What? Should I cut your hair? Sir, your luggage is going. Hey my suitcase. My passport. Hey why does a dying
man need a passport? Its free entry upstairs. I have fixed an auspicious
time to kill you from India. First learn to speak clearly. Does anyone lisp? Come on, go there. Hey Kedarnath. I will kill you. Leave me. hey leave me. Hey I will kill you,
I won’t spare you. – Ok we will deal with it.
– Leave me. Thank you. Thank you, you
surely have to come for my wedding. Ok. Yup. We have made all your wedding
arrangements one by one. – Good.
– Listen. I wanted to tell you
the specialty of my disciple. – I am feeling shy.
– But I am not. Let me say. Groom, whichever couples
trousseau he has stitched himself. They never had fights
in their marital life. I don’t have any commission in this. But you get your wedding
trousseau stitched by him. Ok. Vidhya. Who called me? Kedarnath will stitch
all the clothes of the bride. And he will also
take her measurements. My body measurements? Not yours fatso. I am talking about Renuka. Hey Pundit. Follow me. Why have you come to my bedroom? If Vicky comes to know, he will kill. – Vicky has send this Pundit to you.
– What? He said this Pundit is very lucky,
so he will take your measurements. And he will also stitch
your wedding Trousseau. Pundit, I will turn
around you can do your work. Vidhya. Renuka try to understand,
he will take measurements. I told you to go away.
But you are coming near me. Sorry Renuka. I have no desire to harass you. I know this wedding
is against your wishes. I also know that forb grandpa’s ashes
they are pressurizing you to marry. Whether you love me or not.
You are in danger here. It’s not possible that
I will leave this place. Whatever happens I will make
sure grandpa’s ashes reach you. Then after immersing
the ashes at Kashi. I will leave.
I will never meet you again. I love you. I love you. Ok, I am waiting outside. We will go to Vicky’s
house and brain wash him. That it is inauspicious to
keep ashes at home for the wedding. He will be tensed after hearing this. And will ask us for the remedy. He will talk of purifying
the ashes with prayers. He will be forced
to give us the ashes. We will fake, by trying
to bring the ashes to the sun god. And play our trick. He behaves like a foreigner. Will he believe in
Indian superstitions? It’s our job to make him believe. Come on, let’s start work. Groom, it discard all
the hindrance in your wedding. Performed a small prayer.
Take the blessings. Hey Pundit. Oh it’s disastrous.. ..the hand which will tie
the marital thread has been burnt. That means there is something
unlucky in this house. By the way all the people
who live here are evil. But there is much greater
sinister than them. On the engagement
day the bride fainted. Today the grooms hand got burnt. There is a secret behind it. Master, please give the solution. Hold this. Don’t drop it.
Or else your fate will get burnt. Unlucky.
Black magic. Hail Indian magic. Give me. Black magic. There is an evil power in this house. What? There is something terribly
wrong in this house? Evil power? What do you mean? The whole world is a mistake. But at your house there
is a supremely evil power. What kind of evil power? Tell me. Power, it means bad luck in English. Something which is impure
and not supposed to be kept at home. Yet kept. The old man’s ashes are here. Pundit, the ashes of Renuka’s
grandpa are kept here. Inside the vault,
is that causing a problem? Ashes? Kedari, hold this. Is it a laxative that
you have kept at home? To eat 2 spoons if
you have a stomach upset. – Don’t you have any sense?
– They are just ashes. – How can they be unlucky?
– It is not seasoning, it is ashes. Will you sprinkle
on your food and eat? Forget the wedding. Now even
my father can’t get you married. Will everything be fine,
if I discard the ashes? Should I slap you? What if I keep the
ashes with my neighbor? Are the ashes of
the neighbor’s father? We can’t keep indoor nor out door,
then where do we keep. You both are empty brained.
Useless, you are definitely doomed. If I am doomed then let it be at home. You fool, you will be destroyed. They are the ashes of a 70 year old. Your destiny will go to sleep. It will take 70 years,
for the bad luck to dissolve. You can marry after 70 years. Go and keep it at the crematorium. Pundit it is valuable
is a Kohinoor diamond for us. You want to carry
a palanquin or a tomb? We will have to purify.
Double payment or else go to hell. It’s not the matter of money.
Give us the solution. First remove the ashes from
the house then will tell you. – Come on Kedari.
– Yes master. – Face the Urn towards the sun God.
– Here it is. I will come to my level. – Hey what happened?
– He is running with the urn. Catch him. Security get him. – Boys catch him.
– Yes ma’am. Leave him beauty, pick me. – Hey. Stop it.
– I will not stop. – Stop.
– No I won’t. What can you do? Come on sit, come fast. Hey. Stop. – Come fast she will shoot.
– It’s duplicate gun. His seat has been eclipsed. Oh god. Has made another hole,
hurry up and leave from here. Idiots. I made a big mistake
of giving the urn to Pundit. Sorry because of us,
you had to bear a lot. By the way, what will the
thief get by stealing the urn? He must have assumed it
to be a golden urn so picked it. Boss, here are the ashes. But boss they ran away. Listen Pundit, even if I
get bad luck because of the ashes. The ashes will remain at home. Don’t tell me again to bring it out. If you talk of getting
the ashes from the house.. ..I will take out
your soul from the body. Go away. Get lost. Oh god. I have pity on you.
What will you do in the morning? Don’t put it inside. Don’t hit on the wound. I am not hitting, I am asking. Can’t you see, he will not be able to
sit on the commode because of the pain? – I can see.
– Why are you hitting, if you can see. I have not hit him doctor. And I don’t shoot bullets.
I kill by prayers. – I kill by the holy fire.
– It’s paining. – Do something doctor?
– I am thinking. What thinking, do something. – He has lost a lot of tissue.
– You mean tissue paper? Not tissue paper,
I mean muscle damage. Will he remove the
bullet from the muscle? I mean barbequed meat. Barbequed meat. No non vegetarian. We are vegetarians.
We don’t eat anything else. Only Indian , no chicken. Oh my god, you don’t eat
chicken but are chewing my brains. What is he saying master? – He needs to be operated.
– Oh god. No he will not be operated. We are Pundits,
for us Asana means everything. We can’t afford the expenses. I understood you are
the people with freebies. Please take them outside. – Master please hurry up and help.
– I have to stitch him. Please go out. Don’t move. Or else the
suture will hit somewhere else. Master, how is he now? Doctor said he will fix a plate
of stainless steel and cure him. He needs a plate, we might need a pot. What will we Pundits do? Instead of a Pundit,
if you were a fake voodoo.. ..you would have
performed black magic. – And everything would be fine.
– Should we go to steal again? No master, if we try to steal
again then they will be suspicious. To exchange the real
urn with a duplicate one.. ..this should be our next step. Duplicate ashes? Double role of ashes. Master this is the duplicate urn. We will replace it with
the original one from their home. Do you know the doctor
has put a steel plate inside? You are made of steel not us,
don’t trap us. You also should have been hit. Wow the urn is exactly the duplicate. Is the ashes inside it also the same? – Its onion fritters.
– Onion fritters? – Is it spicy?
– Yes, now hurry up. How did he come inside,
when there was so much of security. Even I could not understand that. Greetings. Are you searching for
a parrot in the greenery? I am trying to recollect
the face of the thief. I will make his sketch. Search him even from under
the world and shoot another bullet. Don’t shoot one but two. – You mail the police.
– Ok sir. I am going to buy a gun. If he recollects the face, we will
have to run to India on a cargo plane. Yes madam. You were telling me the
list of ingredients for prayers. Yes tell me,
what all has to be bought? What happened Pundit?
You seemed much tensed. It’s nothing Vikram sir.
Even though the wedding is in America. But being an Indian, the wedding
has to be in a traditional manner. The wedding will be celebrated then. There should not be any lapse.
Do you get it? – Vicky.
– What? Want to talk with you,
will you please come up for some time? Ok, wait I will be back. What happened Renuka? I want to see grandpa’s ashes once. Is it the idol of god that
you want to see it every day? Bro in law, she is missing grandpa.. ..please let her see
the ashes once. Please. – Kawasaki.
– Yes ma’am. They have to go shopping
for the wedding. Arrange for a cab. Apart from this. – Madam.
– Yes. I forgot to add clarified
butter to this list. Ok Write 5 kgs. I felt as if something fell. I felt as if I have
fallen in love with you. Everyone needs an excuse to fall. – Write.
– Yes tell me what were you saying? I fell. No, 2kgs of cumin. Give me your number will
inform you by what’s aping. Ok. – Hey master.
– Throw. – Come on, let’s go.
– Drive on. – Okay
– Come on, let’s go. – All the best
– Thank you. It is smelling of onion fritters. Onion fritters? Where are you going madam? – For a wedding.
– Whose wedding? – Mine.
– I did not get it. Renuka. Is there a passenger named Renuka? No sir. Railway station? Do you get flight
tickets at railway station in America? Uncle, they have no
bought flight tickets. Master, from Los Angeles to
San Francisco we will go by train. They will definitely
go by train to San Francisco. And they will book flights
to India from there. And will book flight
tickets to India from there. Hope you don’t book
a ticket to heaven. But before that we will cut
the Pundit into pieces on the way. He will come to airport with his men,
to look for us. And when he won’t find us.. ..he will come to the railway
station to search for us. By that time we should escape,
let’s go. Come on, train will leave. – Mummy sit on the window.
– Catch. Oh god. I don’t know why but
I am scared of Vicky. You don’t worry at all,
we will go to Kashi from here. To immerse your grandpa’s ashes. – Listen
– Yes master. When I started liking America.
That ass Vicky started harassing. If Surekha and my palm
lines were united. Then I would.. Dont and sit on a corner seat.
It is for old leaches. – Did you check the luggage?
– Yes there is everything. You seem to be fluent in Hindi.
Are you Indian? No we are Nigerian,
just speak English to pass our time. Made a green card from ration card. He is a comedian from child hood.
Tell me where are you going? We are going to India. Postal address. – Kashi.
– Really. Yes. We are going to immerse
my grandpa’s ashes to Kashi. Oh really, what are you saying? We too are going to
Kashi to immerse ashes. Oh. His grandfather was not
a common man but a great man. Papa, tell them grandpa’s story. 1hr and 5 minutes before freedom.. ..when the candle was burning
and incense stick was on. Then, my great grandma shouted. For what? Because my grandfather was going
to be born, he wanted to be free. That’s why he was named,
Bharat, Indian. He used to celebrate
his birthday twice. Once on 26 th January,
and once on 15 th August. He was born with death on his head. Was protesting for revolution.
As soon as he was born.. ..he was crying while saluting
during the national anthem. What is so great in this?
Everyone does this. His grandfather, gave his
10 th exams during Kindergarten. He wasn’t a doctor but could operate. He wasn’t a doctor and was making cuts
so was he stitching like a cobbler? On rainy days he
would take an umbrella.. ..on an open field
and water the plants. When anybody asked him,
about the umbrella. Then he would say, wont I
get wet if I don’t hold an umbrella. Very good.
Enough of the grandfather stories. – Let’s talk of something else.
– This is the beginning of the end. My grandfather would gather
playing cards at the college library. He was the real champion. He would play very well,
but he never won. That’s why we live
in a hut in America. Hey Pundit. Pundit. Is it raining outside? Hey astrologer is something
there in your ears? When grandpa was 18 +,
he used to play the flute. The hearts of the girls
were beating on his tune. But the girls became spinsters
after seeing his face. Bragging again. My grandpa was sad because of that
and he jumped into a waterless well. There was already
a girl inside the well. They both jumped a lot inside
that she became my grandma. There is no brake in this train,
sit down. Listen to the whole
story before you die. My grandpa would make
salty desserts for the kid’s. And his mother become a pumpkin
after eating his sweet rice. And his one more heartless
dish was Mysore dessert. He used it cook it so much that
all the building people were cooked. One day he made cottage cheese.
There was potato filling inside. Won’t you ask, why there
wasn’t cottage cheese inside? Even if we won’t
ask he will still say. That day, it was a dry day for
the cows, so milk wasn’t available. He added his stories. Grandpa got stuck with
the neighbor like milk and curd. She gave milk on credit to grandpa. Grandpa added lemon
to curdle the milk. – But grandpa fixed the milk.
– Should I pull the chain of the train? From that day till today.. ..29th February, we celebrate
yesterday as cottage cheese day. They have also eaten
potato patty made by grandpa. In which if the potato was not
available then he would add tomato. If tomato wasn’t there
he would order Zomato. You all have caught me,
it doesn’t charge to catch. Grandpa. What are you doing?
Master is sensitive. Grandpa why did you go away so early?
You will have to come back grandpa. His body is perfect for you. Hey are you blind? He is not grandpa. He used to love his grandpa a lot. He has never seen him
in life only his photographs Hey mother torture, how can he be grandpa
when he hasn’t even become a father. – Move away.
– Hey tell your kid to shut up. He will not be quiet like this. – You will have to sing a song.
– Song. Travelling by a family package,
then make him hear a family song. Family song. Hey, grandpa, hey grandpa. Kattapa , kattapa ,O, O. Grandpa, grandpa, O, O. Grandpa’s name is Katapa. O, O. Let’s run. Hey grandpa,
you also sing, its real fun. Move, is my body a train
that your grandpa will travel in it? Out of the frying pan,
straight into the fire. Date. Shut up. I will beat you. Master, please sit down.
Please calm down. I am begging you, please
don’t say a word about your grandpa. Can I tell you in 2 words? How much can you talk?
Don’t you get tired? We don’t want to
listen to your rubbish. Should I tell you the
story if my wife’s grandma. If you utter a word then will push.. ..your present past and future,
into darkness. My ears are bleeding
after listening to you. Worthless, useless. Calm down master, please sit down. Do you know he fought with
the ghost and, then he became mad? The name of the ghost was Kanchana. Attack him, go. Immerse his ashes. – Sit.
– Listen to the song. Vicky is calling? What should I do? hey Pundit,
you tricked me in the name of prayers, You ran away with Renuka. I will immerse your ashes along with
the old man’s, here in the gutters. All the best. Pundit, you are doomed. James. I will take this. Dad when did you come from India?
What’s going on? Sorry we arrested him by mistake. Now he is free. – We are sorry for that.
– No problem. Thank you. Dad what happened? Those 4 Pundits from
India have reached America. They were at your house. He had blocked my number
on all your mobiles. And even got me
arrested by the police. Not only that dad, has he taken
Renuka and the ashes along with him. Where you sleeping
or eating onion fritters? How do you know? It happened exactly like that. Instead of ashes there
was onion fritters. And dad now they are going
to run away from America. Now I will kill them
with my own hands. You directly reach there. This time they will not be spared. Kadar they are goons. I am requesting you please go away. They will not spare you. I have vowed to take
grandpa’s ashes to Kashi. And I never break my vow. Uncle please make
him understand. Please. No dear, those who turn
away from their responsibilities.. ..because of the fear
of death are called cowards. Whatever happens, we will
not go before immersing the ashes. Grandpa is correct, but who
is the speed breaker for the ashes? Her fiance is forcibly
marrying her for money. And he doesn’t want that grandpa’s
ashes should be immersed at Kashi. Nobody can stop grandpa’s
ashes to be immersed. Even if my grandfather
or great grandfather comes.. ..then also it cannot be stopped. Hey the Pundits were sitting here,
where are they? Hey, greedy man. Are you the father of the ash stealer? Yes. So. Do you eat plastic rice? Don’t you have brains? Where are you going to
flush your ashes? In the commode? If the ashes are
not immersed in Ganga.. ..then will it be drowned
in the swimming pool? By the way there are
a few blockage in river Ganga. If you don’t believe me,
check it by dipping into it. Hey, why will I dip into it? All your sins will be washed. They people you have killed. Close your eyes and confess. All you multicolored sins, which
a dry cleaner from here, cannot clean. Hey you talk so much. My grandpa too had
gone to bathe at Ganga. After bathing he was drying his hair. Then he remembered
something was missing. He closed his eyes and concentrated. Then he remembered his
Rexona soap fell into the water. To recover 5 rupees,
he jumped into Ganga. Then there was a flood
and he slipped away. That day the whole of
Banaras was searching for him. Give me the photo. Look at grandpa’s calm picture,
and calm your anger. This is his one pieces ashes. My grandpa had short time memory loss. Did he play the part of Ghagini? He was divorced because
of this memory problem. Neighbor’s money is my money. In short, I will explain in detail. My grandpa indulged in debauchery. He molested the maid, so the
people of the society, beat him a lot. That day he broke
off with the neighbor. He placed his head on grandma’s toe. She happily massaged his head. – Somebody please stop the train.
I want to jump. – They patched up. – It’s much more interesting ahead.
– Shut up. – Will you suck all my blood?
– Hey, listen. I will start from the very beginning. One day before independence,
my great grandma, had pains. She screamed. – Why did she scream?
– Grandpa was kicking. And as soon as he was born he cried
when they played the national anthem. – The little grandpa had grown.
– Is he mad? We celebrated his 10th
birthday when he was 5. When he was of the marriageable age.. ..then girls were crazy
on his tune of the flute. But when they saw his face. Then she drank liquor
and fell off the terrace. The girl’s tombs are there,
still today. Why did I enter this train? My grandpa was more bothered
about his health then the family. He would eat raw food
so that he doesn’t become fat. – He would chew grass like a goat.
– Tell me where the Pundit is. Listen to my story.
Grandpa used to make salty desert. And his sweet rice was famous. She even suffered from
dysentery by eating that rice. There is one more dish.
Mysore dessert. If you eat that then you too
will be cooked like a boiled egg. Enough. I will stop, just gamble with me. They both are my cashier. If I lose, take money from them. If you lose, I have 3-4 more stories. – You will have to hear it
standing quietly. – What is it? They are stories about
my great grandfather. Stop it. What is this? – Grandfather’s ashes.
– Give it to me. Move away. Oh my grandfather. Hey catch him. My grandfather. Robber with 2 legs
ran away on 4 wheels. Excuse me,
please catch him for charity. Drive faster. Hello Pundit. I am Bunty, grandson of grandpa,
speaking from a moving car. Bloody you What else is left? That girls, father in law had come,
he took away grandpa’s ashes. He should have taken you along too. Come on, quickly tell me the story. – I made him hear the
grandfather’s epics. – Grandpas. You made him hear the same story
which caused low blood pressure to me. Sir, I made him hear the same story,
ball to ball. One day before independence,
my grandpa’s stomach was paining. She screamed with pain. Should I repeat again? Mr. Pundit. You met me here,
please don’t meet me in heaven. He sang the national
anthem as soon as he was born. If I catch hold of you,
I will shower you without water. If you will shower,
I will shake hands with you. Tell me, what do you want from me? The pencil with which
my grandpa wrote stories. The britishers bought it for 5 crores. Put that pencil in your nose. Disconnect the phone. I don’t have a saw, how can I cut. Oh you. That reminds me, he loved a woman. Hey stop this car. I want to jump off. That woman took off grandpa’s rope.. ..and made a swing
of it and was swinging. Hang up or else I
will cut your tongue. Listen to the story
it’s very interesting. Burn your story, in the holy pyre. Sir, please listen. Don’t cry, enjoy the free ride.
Drive fast. Come on. Kedari, there is Vicky in that car. Hey Kedari – Yes master.
– I am missing India a lot. We will only go, after killing him. – Wow!
– Amazing. Pundit, you are dead today. Hey. Rhinoceros is coming with full speed. This car might become an airplane. Today it doesn’t matter if we die,
drive faster. Shut up, you want me
to die before I get married. Hey Kedari, divert quickly. I am feeling very scared. I am there, don’t worry at all. Pundit, you are finished. Don’t underestimate
me because I am a Pundit. Touch me, if you can. He is from the clan of demons,
Ravan, Mahiravan. And you are like Shravan.
You will be engulfed. Nothing will happen. Today
he will die by me. That’s definite. – Leave me.
– Ok go. Kill him and bring the girl. [Sanskrit shlok] Govinda, Govinda. Is there any mantra by
which he will not be beaten? There is a mantra to run away.
Come let’s run away. Not that way, this way. Kedari. Hey you. Has somebody come
to save in a white car? Should we ask for a
lift by lifting our clothes? You have to ask for lift
by lifting your thumb, not clothes. Hey Lift. Oh wow, would have
got more had we asked. We met grandpa. If the stars are unlucky
then even god can save us. He is a giant,
he will kill us with his words. Vicky’s kicks are much better. – Let’s run.
– Run fast! Hey, Kedarnath. Kedari. Vicky don’t hit him.
Vicky please leave him. – Vicky.
– Don’t spare him alive. Please leave him. Hey, dear. Wait. Come on lawyer. You must have fought
many murder cases. But you must never have seen. Look at the live murder today. Take out your mobile
and record his the end. No wait. – Have you gone mad?
– Throw the plough. Move the gun. Don’t shout,
If you kill a Brahmin, it’s a sin. Pundit is a form of God.
Throw the plough. All your wealth will go away.
Drop the plough. Sir, let Laxmi unite with Narayan. Go away from here, you demon. Pundit. Sign on this. Wife. This man looks very powerful.
Let’s ask help from him. Yes let’s go. Help, help. It seems in your territory
there is a dearth of new men. – Your name?
– Popat, ladulal, Gopal sir. Yes tell me, Popat Ladu Gopal. So listen dear, we were going to immerse
our grandpa’s ashes to Kashi India. Ok. – Grandpa was from the
era of the Britishers. – Ok. On 14 th august, midnight
my grandma’s stomach was paining. And she screamed loudly. – Whose story is this Ladu Gopal?
– Story of grandpa and sons. Why should I listen to that story? Because we did not find anyone else,
since morning. Your grandpa give you sweets,
not to me. You will also get, listen to me. – I will finish it off in 2 words.
– Tell. When grandpa was born,
great grandma was crying. But your great grandpa was laughing. Sir, his 5 th birthday
was on his 10 year. – There was a huge cake.
– So why do you want me to cut the cake? At the age of 5,
there can only be 5 birthdays. He used to make salty desserts. Family members had
diabetes by consuming it. He also used to make good
Mysore dessert. Everyone was cooked. Hey dessert, I called you Ladu Gopal,
but you opened the whole sweet shop. I already have diabetes. Get out. There is still left. Will you sign your signature? Why do you want his signature?
Neither does he have money nor land. He works for me for 150 rupees. He owns the whole gold mine. Are you drunk? Renu’s grandpa,
means my master, on his last breath. Has named all his
property to this Pundit. What did you say? Dad. I even have his viral video. Hey Subramanian, I am ashamed
to call you my son in law. You have made my granddaughter
suffer so much, for property. You tried to take his life. Do you know that day, during prayers,
the man who saved my granddaughter? That God’s name is Kedari. And today,
I give all my property to him. Kedari, my son. I request you. Never let my granddaughter
Renuka suffer in life. Promise me. Hey Pundit. Your hands are to worship. You cannot count money with it. Hurry up and sign. – No I won’t.
– Will you or should I shoot you? Shoot on his head. Hey Pundit, this is not for prayers. If you press this gun
the lawyer will reach heaven. Hey, you. Hey, hey dear. Hey stop it, I am begging you.
Stop it. This whole world is because of money. And because of this money,
man forgets his manners. And agrees to kill his own people. And becomes a demon. Property is of no use to me. But Grandpa’s words
are important for me. I have to keep Renuka happy. And for the happiness of the mind,
money is not important. You can keep this property. My heaven is hidden
in Renuka’s happiness. The ashes of my grandfather. I will like sweetening your mouth,
with salted dessert. This is not just your grandfather’s
ashes. But your respect for him. Little one, hold it. Thank you, cigarette, match box. I had immersed your
grandmother’s ashes at Kashi. Immerse my ashes too at Kashi, dear. Should we shoot a take? What is this? – What do you say?
– You say. Shot is ready. One more take. One more. Haven’t eaten anything since 4 days. She will come here and push you. First you have to do pull ups. Pack up, I am hungry. Get up, lets shoot. Hey Durga, goddess Kali. – Cut. Cut.
– What is the dialogue? What is he saying? What are you guys doing? Come on lets go. This is actually,
he gave you a blessing. Let’s take a selfie. Say the dialogue. Don’t make me dance much. – Cut, cut.
– Get me married in the climax. You are too much. – Hello.
– The camera should rotate. – What else do you say?
– You enter after that. Don’t go very close. I will forget the dialogues,
if you make such faces. I swear on your head. Sorry sir. Just a minute. I also forgot. First you will hit like this
and then I will circle like this. Carefully. Once more. Hey carefully. You will come in the frame like this. Have you learnt the dialogues? No, you have to say after that. Wait. What are you doing? You will get us, beaten up in America. Will blast after that. – Look at it once.
– Will I get some desserts? What happened? Cut it.
Will take one more take. Please be serious.