LGR – Freakin’ Funky Fuzzballs – DOS PC Game Review
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LGR – Freakin’ Funky Fuzzballs – DOS PC Game Review

September 8, 2019


[LGR Theme plays] [fizz, sip] Aahhh! [typing] Freakin’ Funky Fuzzballs! Wow, there’s a game with the word “freakin” in the title. When I saw this recently, I absolutely had to own it, so I grabbed it for a couple of bucks on eBay. Just look at this cover art. I have no idea what that is chasing him, but I tell you, that fuzzball strikes me as nothing
other than freakin’ funky without a doubt. And come to find out the company
responsible for this awesomeness is nothing other Sir-Tech. Yes, that’s the same Sir-Tech who is known
for the Wizardry and Jagged Alliance games. And some of those people involved
in those also worked on this. I imagine that’s one colorful résumé they have. Freakin’ Funky Fuzzballs, or FFFFFFFF is full of awesomeness on the outside, but what about the creamy center? Ooh… [sniffs deeply] Aahhh… Sir-Tech floppies. Sorry, as a PC gaming geek, this is… This is the good stuff. The manual gives you some nice illustrations and all the information you
could want regarding the game. I see no mention of a story or plot anywhere, no mention of what universe you’re even in, why you’re a funky fuzzball, and who or what is out to get you. I suppose it does not matter. There’s also this sheet of paper that is a requirement due to some rather off-putting copy protection, which of course greets you at the game’s start. Whatever. I’ve seen far worse. *ahem* Dragon’s Lair… After the generously colorful artwork, the first thing I noticed once the game’s opened is the completely radical music, which is just a short AdLib loop, but man, is it freakin’ funky. [funky AdLib music plays] After selecting some options, and a cool little reference to either H. G. Wells or Max Frost and the Troopers, you jump right into the game in its first time period: ancient times. FFF is a simple-looking puzzle
game of deceptive difficulty. You are the freakin’ funky fuzzball and you must find the key to get to the next level. In the first world, it’s a bit
reminiscent of games like Q*bert Activision’s Frostbite and I’m sure something else that’s so
obvious it’s not coming to mind. You move your funkified ball of freakin’
fuzz around the map using the numpad, removing blocks by walking over them. There is at least one enemy on
each map that you’ll have to avoid, or you’ll get your strength zapped, with all sorts of nifty swearing
happening at the bottom of the screen. Being a Sir-Tech game, I suppose
they couldn’t resist the urge to include all sorts of fantasy elements, like strength, vitality, scrolls, potion, magic and armor. In the first world, all you have to worry
about is your strength and vitality. Vitality is the maximum amount
of strength, which is your health. You can replenish your strength by
absorbing things like pizza and coffee, through some sort of bizarre fuzzball osmosis, I guess. Once you get the required amount
of keys, it will let you know. And then you must find the door to exit to the next level. And that’s really about it. It’s the same basic idea for 15 total levels. The main thing that changes
are the methods of surviving. In these first levels, you’ll want to make
sure that you don’t block yourself off from an area you need to get to, or it’s game over. Input high score, try again. You’ll need a randomly-appearing magic
wand in order to cross these gaps. But act quickly, because the enemies will
run towards them and make them their own. And they react instantly to noticing them, so you’ll have to be pretty close in order
to have any kind of chance of grabbing it. It’s also of note that you really can’t outrun them, since the quicker you move, they quicker they move. Kind of like in Rodent’s Revenge and similar games. It almost feels like turn-based gameplay in real time. Next you’ll move on to the medieval levels, which now include armor, shields, scrolls, and the like. Armor reduces the damage you’ll take, shields shield against one attack, potions restore 100 strength, and scrolls cast a random
temporary spell, either good or bad, like making you invincible or turning you blind. The blocks don’t disappear on
this world, they just change color, so it’s all about avoiding the enemies and uncovering as many blocks as you can until you eventually get the items you need. The other big changes later on
are the modern and future worlds, which introduce diagonal gameplay, using 7, 9, 1, and 3 on the numpad. This is where the difficulty spikes, since coming from the previous
levels to this is really unsettling. Level 15 is the end where you’ll
need to use dynamite on an end boss, but that’s for you to experience yourself. There’s also a multiplayer mode where you can either take turns with up to
ten players going through the game as usual, or with one player playing as the enemy, which is exactly how it sounds, and is somewhat enjoyable if you’re into annoying your friends. And that’s Freakin’ Funky Fuzzballs. It’s not bad for a little while, and the first few times you play through it are enjoyable, if only to see what comes next. The music is fun, the graphics
and animation are good enough, and the controls throw you for a loop here and there, but otherwise they’re pretty spot on. Still, I can’t recommend it entirely, just because it’s nearly the same
thing each time that you play. And since there are only 15 levels, and they’re pretty much the same thing repeatedly with very little changing. It’s not like games like Lode Runner where you keep playing over and
over to see the myriad levels and consistently changing puzzles. I’d still recommend giving it a playthrough. But don’t set your hopes too high.

Only registered users can comment.

  1. Is that Halo 2600 real… "real" or just photo shopped? if it's "real" i'd like to ask if it is indeed real and some one made a game on the cart? or is it just some old atari game with a new label. just wondering.

  2. oh god, AB3d on cd32 had worse copy protection thingy every. The passwords were printed on a black shiny paper thing to prevent photo copying. So the numbers were visible only under specific light conditions and at correct angle. And after a while most of them just vanished, so you had restart the game with a hope that required number code will be visible.

  3. @DylanMayhew It's real, it was released a bit earlier this year, OK'd by Bungie and everything. I plan on reviewing it sometime.

  4. @phreakindee sounds awesome can't wait to see the review of it! btw also thanks for the minecraft video that game is awesome!

  5. You must have to play most of these old games on virtual machines.. May I ask how you can make a screen capture of them? If not dos games, the the old windows 98 games..

  6. @BanjoGate Actually I don't use VMs at all. I play all my games on original PCs built specifically with specs for that period of game. However, if the quality is going to suck when recording I sometimes record footage on DosBox with a config set to the original machine, like this video for example. But other games, like Paratrooper and SkyStrike recently, are recorded directly from video output on the real machines. Windows games are played on older PCs as well, using composite/S-video capture.

  7. Just out of curiousity, but have you ever played Theme Hospital for the PC?

    More on topic, once again a very good and detailled review. :>

  8. @heatblizzard Means you didnt pass the copy protection. My guess is that whoever hacked the game so it wouldnt prompt you in the begining forgot to make sure that the game wont check later. Im having the same problem, wich is a real shame since i'm pretty sure i am like the 2nd person here who had an original copy.

  9. i want theme hospital on win 7 working properly,lol,i dont really like the dos version,i dont like the music,sounds a bit clunky

  10. I got this game as part of a collection back in the mid 90's, which also included Links Golf (1990), Dinosaur Safari and a couple or more FMV games like Pain and… I forget what the other one was!

  11. I could never remember the name of this game! Just that it had something about Fuzz and the Game Over! It's curtains for you!

    This is one of the many DOS games I played when I was young. This is so awesome to find!

  12. I played this game when I was just a kid!!! like Toddler!!! I remember typing in FFF in the ddos to access it! I loved it so much it! So much nostalgia

  13. All i can think are a pair of boxers with the game's artwork printed on to wear, with the words "Time to play with my freakin funky fuzzballs".

  14. Freakin' Funky Fuzzballs, or "FFF." Not to be confused with Final Fantasy, which is just "FF."
    Huh… That joke is far less effective in text…

  15. just started watching. Really enjoying your videos right from the start. I hope there are many more from here

  16. Loving the videos, only just discovered you over in the UK. Would kill to have Goodwill stores here rather than our poor attempt at charity shops!

    If you take requests… Fury of the Furries please!

  17. I saw a pill with a rhino on it in a convenience store that says it will improve your vitality. it also had the back of the top half of naked lady. I wonder if that's the same vitality as in this game?

  18. beat this game when it was probably a thing in the early to mid 90s, was quite fun and eventually beat it with satisfaction.

  19. My friend had this boxed as a kid, i used to borrow it from him, then wonder why the eff i wasnt playing duke3d instead of this garbage lol

  20. Who wrote your theme song? They need a serious high five, it gets stuck in my head all the time.

  21. I have Dos Box version I paid to get this game and it plays but no way to setup music. My Dad's version had midi songs that changed each world.

  22. This was my first ever computer game. Looking at the manual and the key code brought back a flood of bittersweet memories. Thank you!

  23. Hi, each version I find on the internet has the error message "It appears you failed your eye exam!" after the level 3 or 4, but I didn't have the screen you got with the actual 'eye exam', at the beginning. Do you know anything on how to get this screen and how to 'validate' this ?

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