Hello everybody. My name is Markiplier and welcome to the official Attack on Titan game. Now you may know.. that in the past I’ve played a lot of these Attack on Titan games like this one And that one! And that one over there! aaaand that one! There’s like two games that I’ve played. I’m a big fat liar! I have no idea what I’m talking about half the time. And in all honesty, I’m just putting more work on my poor editor. So considering this is an official game, It actually has a story mode that follows closely to the actual anime or the original manga. Whatever you wanna call it, whatever it is. The original story that you know about ‘Attack on Titan’, that stuff happens in this game. I don’t know about the future of it But then down the road, you might know something more about it. I but know all this bullshit!! I want to get to game. Now, ordinarily I wouldn’t skip a story like this, but because it is Attack on Titan and because it’s the ACTUAL game, in relation to all that stuff, I wanna just see myself, zipping through the city and slicing the nape of neck, of all those titan bastards! Imma gonna kill dem dead. Imma gonna kill dem good! Oh GOD! I gotta do a tutorial! Holy shit… Ahh…ahh whoa Euh h- I don’t think i fired a— whoa! Wha- the hell happened Ahh! there we go I was pressing the wrong button. I was thinking the Playstation system. OH MY GOD That is COOLLLL Oh that’s cool! Oh that’s cool this is what I wanted Yeah! eew oh I’m bad at this Shiet. [sic] Urgh Hang on! URGHHH Good god. The pelvic thrusting in this game is immense. euh.. ho Euh AHHHHH! Wooooo! Okay. nuff screaming like a ninny Let’s get into the game. oop.. AaaaaAAHHH! O kay. Ugrhh. The nape. We’re going to lock on to that nape. Yeaaaaaa Buehhh-UERHHH Woah…Okay… I did it… I got one I got it good! I don’t know what the hell I did, but I did something. ErrrrrrRRGH…..Waaah.. Ha ha! Did I do it? Oops… That didn’t work at all. enh….. Aahhhh! There we go. Okay. So you gotta time the boost with the slicey-do and then ooooo! This is awesome! I am very excited about this one. Oh, hi! Hello! Who are you? You- ohhhh Logistician. I like the Logistician. Oh B Okay OOOHHH it’s so cool! I’m gonna get in combat mode on you I’m gonna slice you in the nape of the neck to get your sweet supplies *Makes stabbing noise* ugh – Gimme em! Wh-What happened to her Holy shit she was fucking otta there Place de blades Pfft! then select the gas… replace the gas Pffft!!! there we go Slice that in nice an- Okay Assemble my corp Come er corp fellows Wai- wha- wher… whoa my god Look at em go they’re like little bees Mmmm.. More bees Oh god strike as many limbs as possible in the time allotted I don’t know I don’t know if I’m ready Boss (imitating Japanese horribly) Ba da ba Boom Boom Ha! Stole your kill. Maybe you shoulda been a little bit better about it (Chuckles) He..He.. All right.. Okay… Okay I’m getting it I’m gettin…… It! BOINK! Whooohooo Oh Hell yeah Oh ho ho Hell yeah Oh Hell yeah Grrrrr….. BOINK! Ohhhh myyy Gooood. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. Its exactly what I was hoping for out of an actual Attack On Titan game. I know I’m still doing the tutorial and obviously you’re not seeing the full brunt of what this is… theerreeee–NO! MINE! Aowwh Its mine! Lay off it! How do I -? Am I-? Why am I not-?
Wuu-urrpchaaa! Oh c’mon HuaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAH! Ok.. huh..I’m not doing this one jus-just cause I’m tryna hurry for everyone else to get– eyaaaAAAH!
That’s a bigger one! EEh! How ’bout! Yea..that one! *Makes noise excitedly* Oh! c’mon! Oh! I pressed the wrong button! would-help if I did the..wooooaaaah Aaahh *awkward laugh* j-aahah-just bouncing like a ragdoll off of this thing Aaaaooww! My face Gooooop! There we go! That’s a slice..k 35 total…
Holy Shit ok Kabooski! I’m still trying to remember the button co-ordination for this! Its a lil’ bit complicated..but I’m slowly getting the hang of it Like learning a pianerrr [sic] uuuhhhh! Aowh my face euh there we go! I-I would..I would looove to see someone who’s like Actually legitimately good at this and not ME! I’m not good at it..I wanna be very clear OH! you guessed that already? Oh you could guess that I’m not good at it *sarcastic voice* Oh well thhaannkk you for your expert opinion! hello there! you wanna get-? Siillll-elllLLLLLLLLLIIIICEEEEDDD? (sliced) Okay! Got it! So if I boost multiple times throughout the-the entirety of it..i will get multiple things but I need more gas NO ITS MIIAAAAANE! (mine) No one gets it except for me waaaaah WEEEEEEEEEEE…okay heeehbublu! Give me your sweetness..Give it to all of me BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!! I love the way they moan to the heavens right before they blast off into the night sky Hey they’re all goin’ for that last one buuuuut its mineeeee! Oh no! I’m not gonna get there in time.. Nope. Its dead..okay..alright then It was me..wasn’t it? Aaahhh..crap Of course, It was Of course Yeah I doubt anyone would have done better than Mikasa
But maybe it was.. *gulp*–Maybe if you did good enough but I doubt that would have been possible Yeah… yeah..you suuuuck! *imitates* *pants* “aaah I’m tired” Subjugations? I got an ass ranking! Hell yeah! Awhhhh… I got an A. Alright..now that we’re done with the actual..have learned the swoop..I’ve learned how to swoop it woooh! call this one the “Swoop”..It’s-It’s an evolution of the dab No, its not cool? Shut up, I’m cool! Man..i’m gonna–ah-The thing is I’m only gonna do one episode of this because I-I-I-I’m only doing this because I wanna see What the actual Aaah Legitimate developers of this game are gonna do in comparison to the ones that are fan made games and see how the mechanics are refined..and.. So far I’m very impressed! this is super refined Now I do not know.. I-I-I highly doubt I’m gonna do full playthrough this I think its gonna be one episode for now..I’m gonna do one more mission With some actual titans – to kill them dead – But then AFTER that I think I’m might play this on my own cause it seems really fun! Its like..It reminds me of ahh Spiderman 2 when you’re zipping through the city like… What am I doing here? OH MY GOD AM I SOCIALIZING? …Oh my God – can I flirt with people? Is this also a visual novel? Oh My God *anxious* he-e-ey! Hey there! Let me swaddle right up to you! Oh dear God! The way you turn your head! *seductively* eeh Oh hey! *tries to flirt* how’s it going? Short stuff? Shrimpy-puss? huuuuuuuuuuuh? lil’ man wanna fight? aaaooh? Yea, I didnt think so Why is everyone standing like this? Why is everyone standing cock arm out? why-why is that happening? Hey don’t smile at me while you stand all we- -Everyone’s doing it!! Just cause we need to walk We-We’re preparing to have these giant sword bags on our side the whole time Its like a cowboy with 10 pound Gun gesture …I want to gesture *Deep husky voice* Eheh! Yeaaah! Heh! I’m cool! Wuaah! I’m so cool hey..hey..hey..hey..hey..hey..hey..hey! You cool? *husky voice* yeaaaah What the fuck am I supposed to be doing here? I can upgrade my shit? With bamboooo?! Heeeell Yeah! I dont know what ‘Iron bamboo’ is But okay… So apparently there is a crafting system in this game and like an upgrade system for your stuff.. That’s interesting Woah….That is an interesting knife! OOOOooooh I like it! Oh I gotta play this on my own I GOTTA! WWWAH! BUT THATS NOT THE POINT OF THIS VIDEO! WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Hey Hey How’s it going? Uh hey Ok…I’m ready Of course! I’m ready! Give it to me! YOU SEE THESE MUSCLES?! YOU SEE THIS POSE?! I’ve never been more ready in my life!! yeah..It really is-It really is convenient that they have no reproductive organs If there were Titans walking around with 10 ft dicks slapping between their thighs it’d be even more terrifying than it was before Okay! So now we’re really getting into it! OH! Holy Shit! Well! Alright then! We’re starting right off there! Okay! Well, I’m gon’ get you in kn- in the knees! WOO–A-OAOAOA-AOA-OAAAAAHHH-HHHAIIYAAAA! Okay! Get you in the nape of the neck! NOW! heh-OOOOOOHHH SHIIT!! OHHH FUUCK! *High pitched* AAAAAAAAAAH *Manly scream* HUUAAAAAAH! *Victory laugh* HO HO HO HO HO HO! I subjugated that shit! Oh Hell Yeah! you fade away… eeeha NICCEEE! NICCCEEEEEE! Oh? Hi! Oh not again! Don’t..please! We just built that! You’re so angryyy Owww Ah! Good! Yes, another! I was hoping! Oh! What an handsome devil that Titan is! OH GOD HE’S SLAPPY! Woh! aaaaah woh! okay! so he missed me! oowwh Jeez! Oh Jeez… Need to use the restorative ah! EYAAAAHHOOOOOOOYEEEE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Ya ..Got ya! ok.. Hep! BOING–Ooooh! So..I need to get around and miss the thing..
He’s looking right at me so I’m going to eeeeeyoo! slice his arm up Get behind him get AAEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHH! YES! OKAY! Superior subjugation! One failed attack euuuahaaaaah…It wasn’t..It wasn’y very good to be honest—OHH! Big guy!
OH! Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh SHit!! There’s a father-son combo here well WOh God! So slappy! Oh God they’re all so slappy! Ah! How do I focus? Oh God! I’ve completely forgotten how to focus! OH! There’s your leg go
ok… Now yo-OOOOOOOWWHH NAAAAICCCCEE! (oh nice) YEEEEEEES! this is going much better than the actual anime which if you haven’t watched it..it’s so much less good. Members include…give you items if you stand still next to them I ain’t gonna stand still! Freakin’ Titans everywhere Hey were you about to gimme something? Sasha! gimme FOOOOOOOOOOOD! K..fine! Yush! okay he’s got a eeeeeeeeeeh! awoh! yes!
I dont need distractions! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Oh My *laughter* GO-O-OD ! Hell Yeah!
Oh hell yeaaah! Yeah…that went well! when it comes one at a time But when they alls be swarmin’ it’s probably a bit more of a problem Oh is there?! Oooohhh! Is there a hole???? Still want more.. uh oh kabluleglu It a big man The big guy woooooooooo! I wanna take down big man! Nice! whirly gig style! I like it..
Dramatic but not necessary Woah so angry Hah He’s just gonna stand there stock still. Mark:*mimicking Titan through clenched teeth* Well, I’ll just wait here. If I dont move!!! Maybe he won’t seeee meee! Mark: IT SURE IS STEAMY IN THIS BODY OF MINE. Mark: IN THIS PARTICULAR AREA WHERE I’M STANDING UPON AN ACTIVE VOLCANO!!! Mark: WaaaaaaaAAAAAAh! SURE AM TIRED OF STANDING HERE! okay..heya..habaub! bleeeeeeh! Oh you moved!
Oh God he moved Oh its protected by steam! The most dangerous of things! Ahh… ok. Whoa… what the fuck did I just do? Yeah! Those automated mounted cann– oh I need to do that… I’m gonna blast right in your eyyyye balllllll… *Boink!* Oh… here we go Ri– Right in the eyeball. Ri- ri- ri- ri — BOINK! Boink! Hoh… *Mimicking Titan Again* GRRR… THAT REALLY HURT… BUT I CAN’T LET THEM KNOW HOW MUCH PAIN IM IN! Ah ha! *Mimicking Titan Once More* AHHH–OHHAAAAA–THEY FOUND MY ONE WEAKNESS… …MY HUGE, ENORMOUS ARMS! *PEEEWWWWW* *PEEEWWWWW…* OHHHHHHrewrewrew *Mimics Sound of Titan falling* UGH! *Still Mimicking Titan* HOW COULD I NOT SEE… THAT COMIN’?! Oooopppp …And… … *Ppfffftttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt* Alright, more killin’! It is what I’m here for Whoaaaa…where am I goin? WhooOOAAAA… where Im I goin? I– I WHOOAAAA… where am I goin? OHHH – I almost made that. *Excited incoherent noises* *Incoherent noises continue* I don’t know where I am *Even more noises* Hey buddy! Ignore the fact that… uh… th– that was all terrible Lets go kill us some Titanos Wait… Ohhh I didn’t actually recruit I — I didn’t recruit him awww shit… Where did Armin– Where was Armin? Ohh Armin was over there. There we go. Got him! I’M AWARE! We gotta go get him! HOoooooo… heyyyyyyy Ahhhhh…OHHHHHH What does that mean? I don’t remember what green means Ahhh man! It’s been so long! Side mission? Ohhhhhh… Side mission… Who needs that when there’s Titans to kill?! *Attack grunt* What? Why didn’t that work? What? Ohhh ok! Well! It was a teamwork. I–lead the team, and therefore I get a lot of the credit. Thats how this works, right? Ok… ahh can you — ahhh there we go Ooppp HEYYYY HOOOOO – NICE. All the blood. Please! All the blood. Alright, I guess I could go towards the smoke signal *Disgusted* UUUGGGHHHH… ‘an eaten –‘… ugh, oh god *Gaging/vomiting noises* Well… Waste not want not, I suppose Gimme your stuff there Very gross, but… ok Alright, lets go! We’ve got more people to save Whoa – what are ya doin? *Mimics attacking noise* That was a lot of yellin! Wheeeeee!!! Ya, remember your training, doooooouche. Hey — Gimme your shit! Gi–Gimme your shit! I want — I want your shit, please. …and then go straight up into the a– Awww I thought he was going to fly, straight up into– “OK! My people need me!” WwwwwoooOOOOOO!!! Hey look – It’s a giant rock! Ha… Huh… wonder how thats gonna come in useful later Ahhh come here you! Boink! *Mimics crying* He never stood a chance, he was tiny. …Oh god… Did I kill Pewdiepie? Ha ha – Oh Jeez GRRRRR BEEEEERRRRR PFFFFFF *Makes explosion/battle noises* Oh my god… Oh Jeez – its so satisfying! I love it! Oh man… I mean, its easy for me to say that this is my favorite Attack on Titan game- because obviously the other ones were just fan-made games But this is so well made! I mean, obviously this probably took a long time and its kind of past the point where I would say that Attack on Titan was at like its peak popularity… not that it’s really lost any of it — What is this guy doing? He’s humping that — why is– why is he — whyyyyy is he humping that wall? I don’t know, who knows what Titans are all about… they’re so weird! Oh, I guess I’m goin after this one then! Ohhhh! Cant see me! CAAAAANTTTT SEE ME! I wish the attack was like a trigger button. That would make a lot more sense than just the Y button. Whheeeeeeeee! *high pitched* Ok… Got it got it got it. Got it got it got it Doin’ good, Doin’ good. Like I should Damnit. Damn it all. Stop losing focus! Oh God… WeeeEEEEEE! …Ok. Alright, I need more g— Whooaa wait whoa whoa… Heeeeeyyyyyyyy! God I— oh god… Im actually concentrating and trying to do good now. I wanna– I wanna show you gu– owww. …I wanna – Ah shit! – I wanna show you guys that I’m somewhat kinda good. Not really, but just somewhat kinda. WWHHHEEEEEE! I wasn’t even close to ya, but it still killed ya! Thats just how good I am! Let me just shove new — gas bladders in here… Whats goin on over there? Urgent?! Well he’s probably gonna die… *Mocking other character* What, am I gonna rush across town to help out when I got a Titan right here? *mumbling under breath* guess I better hurry, then… Where ya at? Ohhhh Hellooooo! Boink! Ok…I guess I’ll rush across town now. I’ll get it on the way.. because I’m completely on the other side of the area. Wow – I’ve recruited a lot of these guys Why are you all following me?! Trying to steal my glory! GLLLOOORRRIIIOOOUUUSSSS! Alright, Im comin — Oop, he’s gonna die. He- he- he’s uh very dead. I can’t get over this wall IM GONNA MAKE IT! IM GONNA MAKE IT! IM GONNA MAKE IT! Oh Jeez… … I can’t make it. Ughhh not gonna make it, he’s– he’s a dead man. Whooa! How did I do that? Whoa! Disappeared?! No he’s right here! I was- I was right here. I was there. It was there, it was… daahhhhhh WHEEEEEE… ok. Good good good good… wheeee… Whoop! Ohhh Yeaass! OH YES. Ohhhhhhh – Nice! Yeahhh ah ah ah ahhhhh Yeahhhhhh ahahah Oh hell yeah… Oh HELLLL yeah! Oh Hell yeah! That is so fun. That is ludicrously fun. Ok. So, I think thats all I’m gonna play for this video here, it is super fun. I had a great time playing this. I was super happy the entire time I was killing Titans. Now I’ve heard that later on in the game you do become a Titan – because thats part of the story and then it kind of detracts from the super funness of just flying around and killing Titans but thats the story mode. There’s actually an online mode – I believe – where you can play with your friends and attack on Titans together I– I– I dont know why I keep wanting to use those verbs, but either way it should be a lot of fun, so… Thank you, everybody, so much for watching; and, as always, I will see YOU in the next video. BUH-BYE!!!! Oh ha I’m gonna get ya I’m gonna… Ha… I was so close. I’m gonna get cha big boy OOOhh. No! Hello… I missed I did something Whoa I did something I didn’t do good…